Bon Voyage~ my dear Kim

Just sent Kim off to KLIA few hours ago, she's going to UK to futher her study, and she's now in Bankok waiting for another flight. She goes there for 2 years, but will come back for summer break, yet I can get to meet her only on next year, either May or June. Omg, nearly half a year man, I'm gonna miss her like crazy.

I have promised her to buy a webcam so that we can see each other more often. haha... although I know there are thousand of people out there queuing up wanting to see her thru webcam, ya, she's famous like that, haha. =) Anyway, I still will try my best to shorten our distance by using nowadays technologies. *lame*

Well, on my way home from KLIA to Kajang, lot of things came into my mind.

I started to re-think what I've been thinking and worrying these few days. Those things didn't come in order, they randomly showed up to me and I'm totally stuck in the status of mess.

I'm so unsatisfied with what I'm doing currently.

I just can't seem to join the conversation which is about abroading, unfamiliar city name, latest currency blablabla during the dinner just now. Not first time though. I felt myself being that tiny when it comes to knowledge or even common sense, I can't even find a word to add. I'm not actually depressed because I failed to contribute in that particular conversation. What's annoying me was my value of living.

Ok, make things clearer, I'm worried bout myself. I found myself standing still on the starting-point, aiming nothing and heading nowhere.

Friends and cousin were clear enough of what they're really want and fight for it. What they're doing or did had waken me up, from being the daddy's little girl.

I've taken everything for granted. I thought money will drop from the sky, I blamed daddy for not sending me to study abroad, I think everyone should like me as who I am, I assumed that I'm more to ready to welcome my future.

I just found myself so wrong, I can ruin my myself like this, maybe not that serious, but yet, I'm so lost.

I'm worrying bout my level of knowledge, bout my plan for the future, bout my ability to 'sustain' without supports from others.... about thousand of things. I am just so lost, I no longer know myself.

I didn't keep it all to myself, I told some of my friends. Some said it's pointless to worry bout all these, let the nature take it course. Some said it's never too late to realise these. Some find it's funny.

I dare not to voice out any plan that has come across my mind as I will just throw it away when tomorrow comes. People who knows me well will just agree with my big plan today and listen to my complains on the other day, and things kept on repeating.

Pathetically, I am so ashame of myself, in every way. I don't know what I really want.

As a friend said, changes can't be done in just a second, it takes days, weeks or even years. Afterall, I am the only one who able to decide which path I would be walking, and what life I would be living.

I don't feel like wasting my time anymore. I wan't a new life. I need to improve myself. It may sounds funny and so unreal for you, but I have bear enough of my current life. It is just enough.

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Ok, finish declaring part of my thoughts. Let's show you guys some photos I've taken few days/weeks back.

Went Amuleto, Midvalley with Phoebe and Kim. I dislike the food there, in short, there's a NNT for me.

Random photos that we taken on last Sunday, at Didi's wedding dinner. Please forgive me for being that random, as I told you, I am in mess. *Slap me please*

Yuen Tze and I. We're match like a couple, don't we? You know he's my cousin.

Eliceta and I. She's becoming feminine while I'm getting older. *sweat*

Cousin. Yit Ga Yin.

End of randomness.

Back to Kim.
I am glad to have you as my listener, I enjoy trying new restaurant with you, I am willing to share my secret with you, I am blessed to have you as my friend. *heart*

Wei, study smart but not study hard ya, haha, enjoy your life over there and update me more about you, through whatever way, don't make me miss you that much, you know that I can't stand it.

Wish you all the best and take good care ya. As I said, I will always love you. muahhahaha. *geli* *huggies*

Okla, Bon Voyage my dear friend.